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We’ve all heard it before men and women alluding to having multiple people they’re dating and just calling them members of the “team.” Hell, many of us knowingly or not, have probably been a part of the team; and not as a starter or the captain. On this week’s episode of Real Housewives of Atlanta, Nene, Phaedra and their friend former NFL player Chuck Smith take a quick day trip back home to Athens when the self titled “Big Homie” Chuck lets it be known that he indeed had a team of women in his heyday and some of our favorite Georgia girls were on “the roster.”

Phaedra, NeNe, Chuck

Here’s the deal, while Chuck has been married for the past thirteen years to woman whose mother clearly didn’t know how vowels worked, these two other women were under the impression that her husband had been their boyfriend once upon a time. How tragic for the wife to find out while on a trip with these women she just met that they not only slept with her husband but he spent money on them. Had them flossing around Atlanta on his football player dime and you had no clue.

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Miss Mynique went home and probably let Chuck have it for his lies and he knew he had to pick up the pieces to his wayward penis puzzle. In the process Phaedra had to find out that her Dairy Queen dates weren’t really dates at all but instead just pit stops on the road to getting it on. In the end Phaedra decides any ounce of respect she once had for her hometown buddy is now gone after he basically debunked her idea that they had been a couple. Honestly, I completely understand her anger and disgust the way Chuck dismissed and disrespected her and Kandi because it was tasteless and foul (honestly why did he even bring Kandi up!? She wasn’t even there! Shady.).

P, Nene, Chuck

Let me tell you a story of a young girl who met a guy who was handsome, funny, handsome, and had so much charm he could probably sweet talk the pants off of a nun…did I mention he was handsome? His major fault? His constant absences. Finally after months of trying to link up with said man she finally asks him, “Are you seeing only me? Are you sleeping with just me?” Here’s the truth if you have to ask then you probably already know the answer and though this man said yes all signs pointed no. It is important as a person who is dating to set rules not only for your partners in the game but also for yourself. If you don’t want to be a part of a team then make it known up front.

Now in the case of Phaedra and Kandi it seems clear that each of these ladies were just another notch on the “Big Homie’s” belt and a classic case of “I thought we were dating” which is just sad. These gals had not established rules for themselves or the men in their lives which left the truth to come slipping out in an Escalade on the way back from a Boys & Girls Club. What a shame to find out that you were merely a man’s jumpoff after he invited you to come speak to some kids about following their dreams. Ain’t that some stuff?

Phaedra in shock

So folks fess up, have you ever been a team player knowingly or did you find out after the fact that you were second string booty call? Is there anyone out there who is willing to be a part of the team if the coach is a supposed catch? I want to hear it all. Follow me @Hautemommie let’s discuss all this and much more, I’m ready for the juice!


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‘Real Housewives of Atlanta’ [RECAP]: Are You A Team Player?  was originally published on