For most of us, we only know Tammy Rivera because of her relationship and marriage to rapper Waka Flocka. But she had a whole life before him. And if you know anything about Tammy’s upbringing, you know that it wasn’t all sunshine and roses.
Recently during an interview with Leah A Henry, of Baltimore’s WKYS, 93.9, she shared a bit about being in an abusive relationship from the time she was 14-22, how it initially affected her current relationship with her husband, and later she discussed regretting her decision to get lipo.
Check out these bits from the conversation below.
The abusive relationship
“I don’t try to bash anyone and make any excuses for anyone. But the experience that I had was with someone who was a year younger than me and he probably was doing what he thought he was supposed to do. I thought when a man hit you or controlled you that he loved you. He probably thought that was a way to control the woman. I don’t know if he does that in his new relationships but I did get slapped, I did have my nose bust. I did get choked and all types of shit like that. I didn’t realize that was domestic violence until I got older. Like, ‘Oh, he slapped me b*tch but it wasn’t that serious.’ And as I got older—because I come from Baltimore, sh*t like this happens. Not saying that every woman from Baltimore accepts that type of sh*t. But we come from a rough city and a rough upbringing.
So if you do some disrespectful sh*t and a n*gga slap you, it’s like, ‘Oh, he slapped me but I was being rude or my mouth got crazy.’ As I got older it was like, ‘Hell nah I ain’t no n*gga about to put his hands on me, I don’t give a f*ck what I say.’ So it took me maturity and for me to grow up to say, ‘That’s a form of domestic violence. That’s a form of control.’
I’m not going to act helpless and be like, ‘I used to get my ass whooped.’ I used to fight back but at the end of the day, you can’t beat no man. And I’m not trying to call myself a victim because I’m not. But I have experienced those things.
I didn’t realize how much that part of my life would affect my today life. It took for my husband to show me, ‘Every time I say something to you, you’re very defensive. Like n*gga who you talkin’ to?!’ It’s like I always have to be on go mode to show that I’m always extra hard because I can’t allow myself to slip back to that person who allowed that. You have to understand that even when someone is physically abusing you, it mentally f*cks you up.
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Even when I first got with my husband and we would get into arguments and he would stand up and I would kind of like jump. And he would stop the argument like, ‘Yo, why the f*ck are you jumping? I would never, ever hurt you. Don’t do that.’”
I’ve gotten my breast done and I’ve gotten lipo in my stomach which I never should have done. It was the worse decision I’ve ever made. It was the worse decision I ever made. First of all, I didn’t need it. You know when you have a baby, that little pouch just doesn’t go away so I’m like I’m going to suck this pouch out. And by me doing that, I felt like the fat deposited in other places. I’ve always been bottom heavy. Now I’m extra bottom heavy. People are like, ‘Oh you got your ass done.’ I’m like girl, if I could suck this shit out. I would. My ass is…I don’t have to get a BBL. It’s crazy cuz when I go to my trainers I be like I’m trying to lose my butt. I don’t want this much ass.
You can listen to Tammy’s full conversation in the video below.
This article was originally posted on MadameNoire.com